Lesson learned

I knew there was a reason why I never drive into NYC - it's a traffic nightmare! But I thought it would be a good idea to drive into Brooklyn the other weekend.

The original plan was to take the train into NYC, then the subway to Brooklyn. But when my GPS told me I was only 35 minutes from Brooklyn (I was in Woodbridge, NJ at the time), I decided to drive. Plus, I wouldn't have to spend $13.75 on a round-trip ticket.

Because the weather was nice, everyone was out, so my 35-minute trip turned into an hour in the car. And once I got into Brooklyn, parking was limited. After driving around for about 15 minutes, I found a spot about a half mile from my destination and parked at the meter. I was so frustrated by the time I found the spot, that I didn't check to see if parking was free on the weekends. I guess I was used to the nice gesture because most NJ meters are free on the weekend.

But when I got back to my car a couple of hours later, I was greeted by a bright orange NYC parking ticket! The fine was $35. So my economical way of getting to NYC turned out to be $35 plus, gas, tolls and the stamp needed to mail the ticket!

Lesson learned. Public transportation is the way to go.

What's with portions these days?

I love food and I  admit, sometimes I let the rules of portion control fly out of the window.

But I was shocked at the amount of French fries that come in a large order at Five Guys Burgers and Fries. I'd been craving beef all week, something that rarely happens, and after hearing that First Lady Michelle Obama snuck out of the White House to Five Guys, I decided I wanted a burger, too. Talk about the power of persuasion! 

I had never been to Five Guys before and hardly ever treat myself to fast food, so I was really excited Sunday when my husband and I went. We both ordered bacon cheeseburgers, which came with two patties (I removed one) and we shared a large fry.

Now, when Phillip came to the table with the food, that's served in brown paper bags, the bag was already greasy. Not a good sign. Phillip opened the bag and saw a mountain of fries. He couldn't even see the burgers! The fries were served in a Styrofoam cup that looked like it was about 12 ounces, but then there were fries just poured in the bag - enough to fill another 12 ounce cup! It was literally enough fries for six adults.

America is the fattest country in the world because we've let our portions get out of control.

There is no reason why a large fry should comfortably feed six. And it's not just Five Guys that's the culprit. Super-sized portions are in just about every restaurant and grocery store.

According to the New Hampshire Department of Health and Human Services, portions have grown tremendously over the last 20 years. A bagel in 1989 was 3 inches wide and 140 calories. Today's bagel is double the width and 350 calories. A cheeseburger 20 years ago was 333 calories. Today, that cheeseburger will cost you 590 calories. A serving of spaghetti and meatballs in 1989 was one cup of spaghetti and three meatballs, totaling 500 calories. Today, it's two cups of spaghetti and three meatballs, equalling 1025 calories. I'm surprised the number of meatballs didn't increase! And an average-sized bottled soda, which, in my opinion, is just wasted calories, was 6.5 ounces and 85 calories. Today's bottle averages 20 ounces and 250 calories.

Half a regular order of Five Guys' fries, which the restaurant considers one serving, is 310 calories. I wish I would have known this when we ordered the large.

We need to reign it in, folks! Our portions have gotten out of control as have our waistlines.

And if you're wondering, we did not eat all of the fries! We barely put a dent in them.

Ask and you shall receive

My doorbell rang yesterday, and when I opened it, there was a teenage girl standing there.

She asked if that was my red BMW in the driveway and I told her yes. She then started explaining that her prom is May 16 and the colors are red and white and she wanted to know if she could drive my car to the prom.

What?!

Now, I didn't know this girl and even if I did, I would not have let a teenager drive my car - which still have the drive-out tags in the window - anywhere!

Once the shock wore off, I mustered a "No, I'm sorry." And she just walked away.

It was the oddest request I've ever had in my life.

But once this girl left, I started thinking that it was really ballsy of her to walk up to my door, ring the bell and ask such a question of a stranger. She must have the all-she-can-do-is-say-no mentality. And then I thought, good for her. 

I have that mentality, too. My mother taught me to always ask for what I want, because, in the end, all people can do is say no. And sometimes, you get a "yes." But I ask within reason.

Even though this teen's request was totally out of the question, I hope she continues to ask for what she wants in life, because eventually, she will get a yes! 

Shoe Shame

I'm the first to admit when I have a problem.

I have a problem. There, I admitted it.

And it's shoes. 

I have too many. Some might say it's a blessing when you can open your closet and have actually think about which pair you're going to don that day. It is, but it becomes a problem when you're finding shoes in your closet that you don't remember buying, have never worn or forgotten that you have.

That happened to me two weeks ago. I was putting together an outfit for The Links' Greater NY Chapter's 60th Annual Easter Luncheon and Fashion Show and found a pair of never-worn, don't-remember-when-I-bought-them shoes! I opened the box and the Paolo Brooklyn Silver Patent pair looked familiar, but don't ask me when I bought them.

And then, there's the pair of Betsy Johnson Reese shoes that I pined after for months because I didn't want to pay the $150 pricetag, finally ordered then, got them, loved them, but have never worn them. They've been in my closet for at least six months, but probably longer!

Yes, I have a problem.

And another problem with having too many pairs of shoes is how to store them. I like to keep the boxes, so the shoes won't be just thrown in the closet. But what happens when you start throwing the boxes in the closet? Chaos!

I had had enough of opening my closet door and seeing the horrible mess of shoes at the bottom. Some of the boxes were vertical, some horizontal, some of the recently-worn shoes hadn't made it back into the boxes. So, this morning, I pulled out everything, set aside the pairs for Goodwill that I know I will never wear again, and organized the keepers.

My closet looks much better now - as you can see from the before and after pics. Next, I must tackle my clothes!

Grilled Cheese and Pickles

I've always tried to never judge a book by its cover, and today, my stomach benefited from the open mindedness.

I spent the day in Fort Green, Brooklyn at the Brooklyn Flea, a flea market held every Saturday and Sunday (in Dumbo) from April through the fall. There were tons of vendors selling vintage items from broaches to bicycles. And like most flea markets - especially the outdoor ones - there was food.

I passed Saxelby Cheesemongers' stand with its long line of people waiting for grilled cheese and pickle sandwiches several times before I decided that the pressed sandwiches must be good. I love grilled cheese and I like pickles, but never thought to combine the two. But the treat that awaited me today was simple savory goodness.

I was in line for 20 minutes, in the hot sun (it was near 80 degrees and you see I'm already complaining about the weather) for this sandwich that was served on ciabatta bread. It was definitely worth the wait. The crunchy bread, spicy pickles and soft, stretchy cheese was a true delight!

Keep an open mind and get a treat!

Easter Sunday

Happy Easter!

It happens without fail - every year those C.M.E. (Christmas, Mother's Day and Easter) folks show up at church. Our church is a five-minute drive from our house, including parking. But knowing that we would have tons of "visitors" today, the plan was to leave earlier than usual to make sure we were able to sit in our regular seats.

For some reason, that I won't get into in my blog to spare the embarrassment of a certain someone (but it had to do with a slow poke who had trouble tying his bowtie) we left home 10 minutes later than planned. The streets were clogged. The parking lots were full. By the time we made it into the church, the choir was already singing. And as if we needed another sign that our usual seats had already been taken, there was a line of people waiting to get into the sanctuary. 

The lower level was full and we were asked to find a seat in the balcony. We've never sat in the balcony before and I was upset that we were forced to sit there on Easter Sunday with the other late people. As we sat on the second level, my eyes moved down to the main level, trying to see who was sitting in "my" seat. We don't have assigned seats at church, but most people do sit in at least the same row every Sunday.

After enviously looking down at the people who were on time enough to get a good seat, I glared at the people sitting around us, wondering how many were actually regulars or C.M.E. visitors. I also glared at the bowtie man who made us late.

Then, it dawned on me that I was sitting in church on Easter Sunday angry. I had forgotten that God didn't have to wake me up this morning to even see another Easter Sunday. I had forgotten that it's a blessing every time someone has the desire to attend church, whether they are a regular or C.M.E. visitor. I was giving the devil glory by sitting in church mad that we had to sit in the balcony, taking all the glory away from God.

I relaxed and took a deep breath and spent the rest of the service honoring the Man I was there for. 

Happy Easter!

Car Craze

I've become one of them - one of those drivers who parks their car at the far end of the parking lot to avoid other cars.

I picked up my new car, a BMW 328i red coupe, Tuesday and have been loving it ever since. I love my car so much that I want to protect her from dings and dents from careless drivers who don't appreciate her perfection. I used to make fun of people who parked their cars far from the entrance, away from other cars, so much so, I would park my car right next to their car just to irk them.

But since Tuesday, I found myself parking at the end of civilization. It first happened at my church, where I volunteer two days a week. I drove into the parking lot and subconsciously passed the cars and a few open parking spaces that were close to the door. I stopped at the last spot and pulled in. I kind of laughed, but thought Scarlet, that's what I named her, would be safer there.

Then, I went to the grocery store, where I normally always try to park close to the door. But I immediately pulled into one of the last spots in a row. There was another BMW parked close by, but still away from the other cars.

And yesterday, when I arrived at the gym, I passed several good spaces to park Scarlet at the end of the lot. There was a BMW 6-series also parked at the end, but the driver parked catty-corner taking up two spaces to make sure no one would park next to the car. I haven't gone that far - yet.

I'm wondering how long this behavior will last, how long the car will feel new and special to me? I hope always.

Blessing in Disguise

I was in a car accident nearly a month ago. Don't worry, I'm OK. That's not the reason why I haven't posted a new blog in the last three weeks. I have no excuse for not writing.

But the point of this blog isn't why I've been such a slacker, but the blessing that came out of the car accident.

The accident happened on the Garden State Parkway. Phillip and I (we were in separate cars) had just entered the Parkway, an expressway where the cars are easily driven 80 mph. A couple of minutes after getting on the highway, the car in front of me started breaking, so I started breaking. I looked in my rear view mirror and noticed the car behind me wasn't slowing down. I thought "I'm going to be in a car accident," and then WHAM! I was in a car accident.

The car behind me slammed into me, causing me to run into the car in front of me. This caused the woman I hit to run into the car in front of her. Fortunately, no one was hurt. I had a cut on my bottom lip, but refused medical attention at the scene. However, a couple of hours after the accident, my right hand and wrist were bruised and the entire right side of my body was sore. So, Phillip took me to the ER, where we spent four hours to learn that nothing was broken or sprained.

If you're waiting for the blessing, one is that I survived a four-car accident on a busy highway, and two is that because of the accident I'm going to go from a $500 a month car note to no car note at all!

My 2008 BMW 328i was only eight months old when I had to put her down. Because she was so young, my insurance company valued my car at nearly what I paid for it. So, after State Farm cut BMW Financial a check, I walked away with a nice amount. It probably also helped that I put down a sizable down payment (see my June 30, 2008 blog).

Anyway, because of the leftover money, I am buying a 2008 BMW 328i candy apple red coupe tomorrow IN CASH! We got a great deal because it's an '08 with 9,000 miles. And what's weird is that before I purchased the '08 sedan in June, I looked at a 2008 red coupe, but couldn't afford it. Now, I'm finally getting what I want  - the car and no car note!

Blessings come in the strangest forms.

Things a Woman Should Know about Style

I just read "Things a Woman Should Know about Style" by Karen Homer. 

I bought it for three reasons: I think I have style sometimes, but strive to have it all of the time; for the picture of Audrey Hepburn on the cover (she's definitely a style icon) and it was $7.99 at Anthropologie.

I highlighted statements throughout the book that I either agreed with or thought were funny. 

Here they are: 

• It is the flagrant lack of practicality that makes high-heeled shoes so fascinating.
  

I thought this quote made so much sense that I tacked it to the top of my blog about how much high-heeled shoes hurt. High-heeled shoes hurt like heck, but they are so beautiful, which is why I continue to wear them.

• Accessories are to girls what DIY gadgets are to boys. Gratifying for a while, but you always want a newer model.

I couldn't agree with this more. My husband, however, doesn't think there's a correlation. I love bracelets, necklaces and rings. He loves his CSI 2120 dual channel vibration analyzer and his Panametrics AT868 ultrasonic flow meter, whatever those are! I'm always looking for that next great piece of jewelry and Phillip, well...

• You are never too fat for your accessories. 

I loved this so much that it was my facebook status yesterday. I have fat days more than I'd like to admit, but on some of those fat days, I still want to go shopping. Hence the previous item. While my pants size may go up and down, my shoe size and ring size will always be a six.

• The most enduring accessory of all is jewelry. Jewelry should be acquired over a lifetime of inheritance, extravagance and self-indulgence. Buy carefully or cheaply. Preferably don't buy for yourself at all.

Self explanatory. 

• Diamonds really are a girl's best friend. Especially big ones.
  

Again, self explanatory.

• Don't just buy because it's cheap.

How many times have you bought something that was either too small (and you thought you'd lose weight to fit into it) or just wasn't that great because it was cheap? Don't.

• (When looking for a style icon) never copy a woman who has had breast implants.

I have nothing against breast implants, I just thought this was random and funny because it was the only time Homer mentioned implants in the book. Homer suggests Nicole Kidman or Halle Berry as icons.

• Carry yourself well. Walk tall and proud.

Your back will thank you.

• At parties leave your bag at home. Make your boyfriend carry your lipstick in his pocket.

...and your keys, blackberry and business cards, etc.

• Don't buy designer rip-offs. So what if no one else knows. You do...Think of a bag as an investment.

I've been guilty of hitting Canal Street to buy designer knock-offs, but after I bought my first real designer bag about two years ago, I just can't bring myself to buy a fake bag. There's something about carrying a real designer bag that makes you feel good. And if you buy the right one, it will be timeless.

• You will always need more than one handbag. In fact, you can justify an almost limitless number. Like shoes, handbags are something a girl can always do with more of.

Something else that just makes sense.

• Fur coats are unsuitable for women under 40 years of age or 5'5''.

What? I'm 33 and have wanted a fur for years. And I don't think I'm going to wait until I'm 40 to get one. I'm not sure where Homer is going with this. She explains the height factor: "Short, round women in fur look like Mrs. Tiggwinkle," she wrote, but doesn't address the age issue.

• And lastly, style comes from the inside, so until you are happy in your own skin, you won't look good in anyone's else's.
  

I couldn't agree more!

Now, go and be stylish!

One-armed host should spark diversity discussion not dissention

Cerrie Burnell has ignited a controversy in London because the one-armed actress was hired by the BBC as a children's television host.

Burnell was born with an incomplete right arm that ends in a stump at her elbow and parents are worried that the host's arm will scare their children.

Most children are naturally inquisitive and ask innocent questions that many adults are embarrassed by. And Burnell said children do ask questions.

"Children come up to me in the street every day and say 'What's that?' I wouldn't say they're frightened, but certainly they're inquisitive," Burnell said in an interview. ''I would always take the time to explain to a child. All they want is an explanation."

But while children want an explanation, adults wanted Burnell off the air. Parents complained to the network that their children would have nightmares after seeing Burnell. Rather than complaining to the network, parents should have used the situation to explain to their children about differences and diversity and how to appreciate and respect them.

Sir Bert Massie of Great Britian's Equality and Human Rights Commission said, "I think what's happening is a number of adults do have prejudices, do have very negative views about disabled people, and instead of admitting the views are their own, they're projecting them onto their children."

I hope the parents who complained take a second look at the situation and their insecurities with people with disabilities and teach their children to embrace the diversity in people, not fear it.