Thursday, January 1, 2009

The New Year brings limits


My husband and I swore off going to New York City on New Year's Eve three years ago after a disastrous night at a club.  

We were with five other couples who prepaid for tickets. One couple's name wasn't on the list, so they never got in. I left my brand new digital camera in the bathroom and of course it was gone two minutes later when I realized it and the free bar was a good idea in theory if there had been more than three bartenders for 500 people. It took nearly 30 minutes to get a drink. And the train ride back is always standing-room only because so many New Jerseyans go into the city for the new year and leave right after midnight.

We had had enough and vowed never to go into the city again unless we had a house party to go to. For the last three years, Phillip and I had candlelight dinners at home on New Year's Eve. He grills and I make the sides. We get dressed up for each other and use our fine china. It's always been a wonderful night.

This year, we got an invitation to a house party from our friends Carla and Michael who live in Maryland. Michael, a law professor, has a year long teaching assignment at New York University and the school provided a three-bedroom apartment for him by the school. We had to turn down the invitation because my nieces, Kendall and Kaylee, are staying with us for the week.

When I offered to keep my nieces I knew it would include New Year's Eve, but my love for them overshadowed the night. Plus, we hadn't been invited to the party yet.

But last night was filled with mixed emotions. I was happy my nieces were with us, but sad that we didn't have the option to go into the city for the party. I truly felt the limits of parenting. One of the reasons why I've held off on having children is the limits they place on your life. Not having any options last night really drove home the point of how much a parent's life revolves around a child's. 

Phillip made a delicious fillet mignon, but I could hardly enjoy it because Kaylee, the 17-month-old, who already had dinner, wanted to sit in my lap while I was eating.  We didn't have time to get dressed up because of the kids and we completely forgot about bringing out the fine china.

While I am happy to see another year, last night was the saddest New Year's Eve I've experienced in a long time. 




2 comments:

Anonymous said...

The candlelight dinner sounds like a really good idea. Your nieces will cherish the memory of spending time with you all as will you. Keep up the good work Auntie!

Anonymous said...

Yep, kids will definitely re-shape ones social life. Good blog.